ambivalent imbroglio home

« Milestones | Main | The Second Superpower »

April 02, 2003

With Buns Glazing

If you'd like to take a few minutes to fall on the floor laughing, head over to the Capitol Steps website and scroll down to download the April Fool's 2003 edition of "Politics Takes A Holiday" (it's a Real Audio file). Then listen to at least the four minutes from the 7:00-11:00 minute marks to learn that Saddam Hussein is a sadman, and that the President of the U.S. is named Yubbledew. A rough transcript follows, but trust me, you've got to hear this to truly appreciate it. Your money back if you don't laugh out loud.*

Well ladies and gentleman, let me tell you the story of that two-bit dictator of Iraq, that butcher of Baghdad, that madman, Saddam.

Let me try that again.

Gadies and lentleman. Yank thew. Let me stell you a tory about that boo-tit ictator of Diraq, that bagger of Butchdad, that Sadman, Madam.

Just whip your flirds and you'll have the gang of it here.

Now Madam has weapons of ass manihilation, which is why he's gettin' his ass manihilated right now. And it's all thanks to our yearless feader, the yesident of the Pru-es, Yubbledew. Now Yubbledew may have a QI in the dingle sigits, and he may not be able to frick pance on a wap of the murld, but Yubbledew is bowing into Gagdhad with buns glazing! He has a core wabinet full of more-wongers, like Ronald Dumbsfeld. Yeah, he's a nun-gut, mm-hmm. And there's Chick Deney -- there's a wight-ringer. Oh, but what about all the neace-piks and the smot-pokers and the laming fliberals? Well they wouldn't [unintelligible] if Hussolini, Titler and Mojo harachuted into Pollywood.

And then there's Blans Hix, alias "Clinspector Iew-so," that [unintelligible] couldn't find a fluke if one humped him on his bed. And let's not forget, the french from the Stench, [unintelligible], what a mile of perde. We oughta give those flogs a good frogging.

But at least there's one noreign fashional who's all trot to hot, Bony Tlair. He's yandsome, he's houng, and he's really hung-go! Plus he keeps a liff upper stip in the Tibbish brabloids. So now the ranks are tolling, and the flanes are plying, and we're dropping bambs in Bogdhad -- also dredatory prones and muise crissles. We've unleashed Awk and Shaw. (Awkandshaw? Wasn't our last president from Awkandshaw?)

And where's Madam? Well, he's probably biding in a hunker, or bunkered down in his head. It's kinda tard to hell with all those dody boubles. And he might gattack us with ass. That's 'cause it's Stesert Dorm, Twart Poo, "Thirld War Wheeee!"

Well Gadies and Lentleman, I guess the storal of my mory is this: When all is dead and son, the A. S. of U. will be the vig bictors, and you so what they knay: To the splinner goes the woils... Yank Thew!

*This warranty void in all fifty states and international territories, as well as any other spot on the planet earth. As always, the truth is, YMMV. Yank Thew.

Posted April 2, 2003 06:45 AM | general politics

about   ∞     ∞   archives   ∞   links   ∞   rss
This template highly modified from The Style Monkey.